+ The Garbage Man Can [Go Back]

(The family is visiting Homer in his new office)
Marge: I'm really proud of you Homey. But can the garbagemen really do all the things you said?
Homer: Oh, the garbageman can, Marge. (Homer snaps his fingers and is suddenly dressed in a fancy garbagemen uniform.) Homer: The garbageman can.
(Homer snaps his fingers and is suddenly atop a Springfield garbage truck. He points forward and leads a fleet of trucks away. A tune resembling "The Candyman" begins to play.)
Homer: Who can take your trash out? Stamp it down for you?
(Atop the truck, Homer passes through a neighborhood as fancy-dressed garbagemen take trashcans to the curb and stomp down their trash.)
Homer: Shake the plastic bag and do the twisty thingie to? The garbageman!
(The garbagemen tie up the garbage bags and leap onto the sides of Homer's garbage truck, holding their hats out in a flourish.)
Garbagemen: Oh, the garbagemen can!
(Krusty is taking a out a box labelled, "Used Up Porno" when the garbage truck pulls up. Two smiling garbagemen leap off the truck and toss the box on he heap. Krusty weakly smiles and waves.)
Garbagemen: The garbageman can, and he does with a smile an never judges you.
(In the Simpson kitchen, Marge removes one of Maggie's diapers and turns to Bart and Lisa.)
Marge: Who can take this diaper?
(Lisa and Bart hold their noses and wave it away. A garbageman looks in through he window, taking the diaper.)
Garbageman: I don't mind at all.
(Chief Wiggum, in a tuxedo, eats a hot dog in his bedroom. He has a huge mustard stain on his shirt.)
Wiggum: Who can clean me up before the big policeman's ball? The garbageman!
(Two garbagemen race in and scrub Wiggum's shirt.)
Garbagemen: Yes, the garbageman can!
(At Moe's, U2 sits at the bar, holding up their beer mugs and swaying.)
U2: The sanitation folks are jolly, friendly blokes, courteous and easy going!
(A garbageman walks across the bar, moping up, as the other garbageman whispers something to Bono.)
The Edge: They mop up when your overflowing!
(We see another shot of U2 sitting on their barstools, revealing that their rears are exposed. Each member of the band pulls up their pants.)
Bono: And tell you when your ass is showing!
(Garbagemen parade through Springfield, holding trashcans. Apu pops out of one of them, followed by Sideshow Mel, Ned Flanders, and Oscar the Grouch.)
Apu: Who can…
Sideshow Mel: Who can…
Ned: Who can…
Oscar: Who can…
(Homer leads a percussion of garbagemen playing trash lids like cymbals and cans like drums, followed by trucks.)
Homer: The garbageman can! (Lisa and Bart rush in to march with him.)
Lisa and Bart: 'Cause he's Homer Simpson, man!
Everyone: He cleans the world for you!
(As the parade marches into the city dump, the townspeople cheer.)